Ask Anything, I'm 42!

Why is there a pickle on my floor?

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What is the meaning of life, the universe, and everything?

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Maybe the cat hair is a clue? Or it’s a naturally hairy pickle.

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There is literally cat hair on everything I own.

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why isn’t there a little cake by your username?

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Happy Birthday @benjaminleebates!

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Same. There’s cat hair on the dash of my car. Apparently I’m shedding cat hair.

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Q1 Why is damn near EVERYONE turning into an effin Karen over these damn masks!!!

It’s like the reviews on Amazon where it’s an $18 “vegan” leather purse and people are super pissed that it’s not real leather or that it doesn’t look expensive. :exploding_head::exploding_head::exploding_head: W in the actual F?!

Q2 Will I ever develop patience for those who are less than smart? (obv this doesn’t include folks with disabilities)

Q3 When this is all over, will it be perfectly acceptable to ask someone to social distance themself a few steps back because they’re invading my personal space?

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I cannot, this is the closest I can get to 300 lbs of candy… although, it’s not fresh.

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Yes, but only when mercury is in retrograde…

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Name it Rick and draw a face on it and place it back in the cucumber section at the supermarket…

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Because Woot doesn’t have the capital to send me a real birthday cake…

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Q1…
Because everyone has a little Karen inside them… They just need a “crisis” to let it out…
“Vegan…?” DAMNIT, Karen, that’s called pleather…"

Q2
This stems from a childhood need to try… So when you see people that don’t seem to put the effort into self-improvement (mentally) then you lose patience. It’s a type of projection and is perfectly normal. Expect everyone to be a little dumb and you’ll find things are a little easier to handle.

Q3
“Social Distance” will be a word that causes PTSD and it will be Trumps fault, I give it about 3 months and this will be a news story. Just tell them that your doctor thinks you have Covid-20 and they need to stay 7 feet away…

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You parked in your neighbors garage again, didn’t you…
Do we need to talk about your “liquid lunches?”

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Somebody keeps saying I’m a cat. Am I a cat?

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Yes, but only when your eyes are closed.

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Dang it!

Also:

Also also, Happy birthday!

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Do you take personal checks?

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Yes, yes I do…
I also accept tips. and electronics… and cake! Oh, sparkly things… and…
And pretty much anything anyone is willing to part with… LOL
I inherited a strong “pack-rack” gene from my mother’s parents.

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