Stop making me choose one!
What are your plans for Thanksgiving?
- Just me and a microwave Marie Callender’s pot pie in my basement bunker
- An intimate meal limited to household family members only
- A small gathering of 10 or less, outdoors, with plenty of social distancing
- A festive occasion with lots of family, friends, and COVID…Lots of COVID.
This Girl. Because why?
Well, It’s me. So. Hi!
You know I gots rhythms & rhymes
made up on a dime…
What else do you need?
Except buzzy wine.
If you wanna spit
Who else would you call?
but the craziest Wooter of all?
We all know who that is…
Unless it’s Noob’s Quiz.
JUST DELETE &
I’ll just lotion my feet
and paint my toes pink…
'Cuz ya’ll really stink.
How’s that for
We all know there are few
who WOOT would read
and pretend that they need
than monkey’s bald brother.
Him or her,
We truly are sure,
Words are too pure
Like a clear water shore.
I’ll keep coming back
even though I am whack,
but the friendships indeed
are much more my speed
and after all…
isn’t it all about me?
However, In case,
you need PR space,
then I am your girl,
with a twirl and a whirl.
Other than that,
for tit and for tat,
I shall remain,
The girl with Real Game.
Or, I’m just tired
and pretend I’m admired
That’s mostly the case
Since I’m mostly on base.
But if you need a quick quip
my phone’s on my hip
so don’t hesitate,
I won’t make you wait.
Oil changes for your car?
- Strictly dealership
- One of those little quickie places
- Ah … that something I’m supposed to be doing?
Favorite secular holiday?
• New Years
• Valentine’s Day
• Fourth of July
• None of the above
HEY! I STARRED IN SOMEONE’S SCREENSHOT!!!
Peanut butter and…
an ambulance ride due to a life-threatening allergic reaction
Current doorbell situation:
- 1 bell, standard chime
- 1 bell, video-based
- 3 bells, none of which work… thanks woot
Replace as soon as that first chip or rust spot appears
Buy itty-bitty microwave paint bottle and touch up chip or spot
Buy a big bottle and spray can, touching up old areas plus big new ones
Don’t give up until arcing
M: I love looking out the window at the snow. What is that?!?! It’s the abominable snowman!!!
M: OH It’s you. Just came back from the outhouse??
Monte: “…and that’s how I know they put asparagus in my smoothie.”
Mort: “Eeeew! Anymore smoothie conversation, Monte, then Bang Zoom, to moon!”
M: These rolling blackouts are a real problem.
M: Yep, dinner prep can be so messed up. Want frozen fish for dinner?
M: We had fish in the freezer?
M: Nope…aquarium froze during the last blackout.
Mort: I had this dream last night.
M: I’m going to regret this…what was your dream?
M: I was sleepwalking & found an ice skating rink in the yard.
M: Did you put water in the kiddie pool?
M: Ummm, told you I was sleepwalking.
M: Why is the carpet wet?
M: I was just outside shoveling and was too tired to take off my boots.
M: But the driveway and stoop aren’t cleared.
M: I got tired trying to dig out of the garage and stopped.
Not very witty, but actual conversation in my house today.
Poll: Oldest gaming system connected and working in your house now:
- Atari 2600
I have all but 1.
Snow makes me:
Wish it was summer
The number of items I buy on Woot every day:
Everything. I buy it all.
Favorite type of “Cats”:
•All the Memes on the internet
•The movie/theatrical production
•The ones that tolerate and sometimes appreciate our servitude
•I don’t like cats !
M-what’s that cat doing here? I told you to
Take it back where you got it.
M-you know our lease doesn’t allow pets
M-I know, I took him back.
M-He beat me home !
Mort: Save the Beer Drinker, Save the World.
Mort: Stupid voice to text…That should say, “Cheerleader”.
Monte: Still: Wait…what!?