Dear Max, I am sorry to say that I have secretly found out that Mr. Blume is having an affair with Miss Cross. My first suspicions came when I saw them Frenching in front of our house. And then I knew for sure when they went skinny dipping in Mr. Blume’s swimming pool, giving each other *$%&#$ while you were taking a nap on the front porch. Why am I telling you this now? Because you’re such a good friend. Take care, pal.
Fondly, Dirk Calloway.
As Spryte usually says: “As always, friendly derby discussion is always welcome. ^_^”