Comments for individual derby entries are placed in this thread.
This is a self motivational design.
Memo to myself, these jobs do not exist:
Time travelling Rockstar
Robotic cop
Paranormal Exterminator
Irresistable 50’s mechanic
Boy Wizard
Supernatural archaeologist
Fantasy Warrior
Whale-rescue Kid
Friendly Ghost
Superhero Scientist
Here are some details!
http://www.infinitywave.net/getarealjob-detail1.jpg
http://www.infinitywave.net/getarealjob-detail2.jpg
Thanks for looking! You can view a full big version here.
Please vote if you like this design! 
—Spiritgreen
Quite fittingly, this got finished during owl hours.
I’m Very Motivational.
You know, a shirt that says I’m the life of the office water cooler, there with a pithy phrase and a cute kitten. Totally employable.
If you’re working at multiple places, you won’t even have to change!
This is clearly a work of parody. Even though I attempted to make the logos recognizable, nothing was copied from the original logos – these are all hand-drawn.
Visual Thinker
My Pursuit of Excellents ENDS NOW!
This is to tell the HR person that all that effort you put into looking nice and studying hard to get that job will no longer be applicable.
And yes, the misspell is intentional 
Thanks a ton for the help, especially Odyssey who really came up with a ton of suggestions.
everyone wants a good employee that wont get fired
Mmmmm gestalt. voted!
Today, my boss told me to bite him.
Also, look at the image below. I have willingly signed this contract myself!
I will work for food, to prove to you guys that I mean business.
Thanks as always!
I come highly recommended by my previous employer who sold me this shirt.
As seen in Step Brothers. Enjoy!
Perfectionist
The old standby for “what’s your biggest weakness?” Wear it to show your potential employer you know what “perfectionist” in the workplace really means. Or just wear it because you’re like me and you sometimes can’t see the forest for the trees and leave half your stuff unfinished.
This is my first entry in a few weeks, and I enjoyed making it. So, hopefully you all enjoy it. I would like to make a special thanks to SkekTek for the suggestion on the wording.
Personally, I think this would rock with some glow in the dark ink, but that’s completely up to the woot gods.
Comments are always welcome! Cheers!
HIGH-RES BELOW
What better way to advertise/interview for a job as a walking billboard?
If you wear this shirt to an interview, you are guaranteed to get the job. *
*Unless there’s a dress code or your potential boss has no sense of humor. Then you’re out of luck.
What better way to show the design world that you’re a rebel?
Buzz words, all you need to get through the corporate world
Oh yes, looking good!