Overheard in the Office


#841

Overheard in Costco “There sure are a lot of human beings in here. I wonder what planet that are from?”


#842

(Clipping Fingernails) Several times each and every day.


#843

“I mowed the lawn yesterday and it killed me. I’m still alive today, but it killed me.”


#844

Years ago: Employee came to me and said, so and so sold me bad crack.


#845

“…Have you ever spent any time with three young boys?”


#846

“I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS!”


#847

“Well, as usual, the figurehead will ultimately make the decision…”


#848

“I have on a ton of lotions, potions, and perfumes!”


#849

“Do you wash your meat before you eat it?”


#850

“I hooked up with Dennis”


#851

“I learned over the last couple years, as I’ve gained so much weight, that all the clothes I thought were stretchy, really aren’t stretchy.”


#852

“By my second glass of wine, you don’t want to know what I think about that.”


#853

“Yours is the first pair I’ve actually seen in real life.”


#854

“This stuff I put in my hair made it really crunchy!”


#855

“Yours is the first pair I’ve actually seen in real life.”

  • Hahaha! I wonder what he/she was referring to? :slight_smile:

#856

“So you were dry humping your desk when you broke your stretchy pants?”


#857

oH, DEAR GOd, thEre’s DoughNutS!


#858

“I have big hands and I like grabbing things a lot.”


#859

^^^^ Donald Trump quote!


#860

“He’s a big fat liar. Screw him!”