It was in the Woot-Off.
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You can still get a CAP cap.
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I just checked and it says I have a 4.1pound package coming from Washington state. I’m not exactly sure what it is but that would be a whole lot of spiders if it’s from @davejlives. I’m wondering if one could claim them on their taxes…asking for a friend. 
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could be rats
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Ooooh, rats. Any chance they’ll have communicable diseases?
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I’ll be naming mine Fink, and teaching him how to turn servers off, then back on.
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I think I understand you a little better now.
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I tentatively have 3.1 lbs worth of spiders coming from Seattle! Why do I do this to myself? 
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Remember these safety precautions when you get your box:
- Wear PPE. Wear ALL the PPE.
- Open it outside, preferably out in a desert somewhere.
- Have a blowtorch handy. Because spiders.
- Dig a large hole to toss it in, should the need arise. Be prepared to cover it back up quickly.
- Make sure to wear shoes you can comfortably run in for at least five miles.
- Be safe, be quick, be sorry you ever participated.
Good luck and may no spiders be with you.
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Or Aquanet and a lighter.
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SPOILERS BELOW. SCROLL DOWN… IF YOU DARE.
So.
I guess living a state away from Dave in Washington has its… advantages? No, that doesn’t feel right. Anyway, I got my desk crap. I was so surprised that it came that I forgot ALL of the warnings I gave @mareli83 above and went ahead and opened it right up.
I’m pleased to report there were no visible spiders, but who’s to say what scurried out when I wasn’t looking. But was it free of vermin? Well.
Well.
WELL.
Upon opening the box, one of the first things I noticed was one of the green ‘liquid disappointment’ cups… with something in it. What was it? Hmm? Oh, wait, I already know, so why am I asking. Anyway, this is a recreation of what I saw because the item was in a bag and I took it out of the bag and stuffed it back in the cup.
That’s right, it’s a RAT. And, yes, it is happy to see you. Or its tail is sticking up. Or both.
And this was on the bag the rat was in:
I don’t know what that means! I shook my rat so much and nothing happened. Maybe I killed it. I don’t want to massage it. That’s creepy.
Also creepy is my dog wants the rat. I think she wants to make sure it’s dead. She would gladly rip it to shreds if I let her. I won’t. Probably. Maybe.
Anyway, there was more stuff. A couple of collector’s items, now that they don’t put bags in BOCs anymore:
Some Occer high powered binoculars:
We interrupt this post to play with my dog, Anna. Please hold:
Thank you for holding. Anna is a good dog. Now more stuff…
I think Dave is trying to tell me I’m old. I already know that, Dave. Geez. (Please excuse the dog’s toy on the left.)
Next up is a little paper notebook thing with a cushy cover:
I tried googling what C2FC means but I was confused so I gave up. But then Dave threw me a bone:
The dog wasn’t interested in it, which is fine with me.
One Energizer headlamp, if you please:
Some Nespresso hazelino muffin things:
A meat thermometer for all that cooking I don’t do:
And, finally, a set of Woot-Off lights:
I do not need Woot-Off lights. I have so many of them already. Why am I still happy to get more? What is this sickness within me? Maybe I will use my headlamp and binoculars to try to find out.
Anyway, that’s what I got. I hope the other weeners get something equally as… whatever this is. Maybe better? Wait, is better actually better or worse? I’m not sure.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to name my rat. I’m thinking Dave would be a good name. Or maybe Kirk, the mail guy who actually sent the box. Hmm, decisions, decisions.
Thanks, Dave.
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Congrats on your new pet.
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YOU GOT A PENGUIN CATCHING KIT!!
Bait: Woot swag
Spy glasses
Catch bag
A place to write @jniemeier’s recipe for BBQ
Temperature probe
Carry-out bag for leftovers.
It’s perfect!
Congrats!
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Customer Connection - Fulfillment Center. That’s when folks with higher level titles are put in fulfillment centers for a couple of days so they get first hand experience of what actually goes on.
(I guess it’s kind of the opposite of automotive engineers, where they DON’T see what mechanics have to deal with on a regular basis, so serviceability isn’t taken into consideration. Changing a bulb should NOT require removing the wheel, fender liner, bumper cover, and housing, y’know!)
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But why would I want to catch a penguin? Unless @jniemeier wants to come get the stuff to make their own trap welcome kit.
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Well, why else would Dave have spy glasses in his desk?
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