My Barnstorming on Camels arrived, and it was filled with all the disappointment I was promised.
Beside my cautionary Woot! bag, I received:
A wireless mouse (What? Like I can’t use a touchpad like a grown up? And red?! Far too distracting for a mouse!)
A smiling foam poop (that my children will leave in awkward places)
Monster high fashion sketch book (that my son took, and I think he means to use to it woo the 8-year-old girls in his class…)
Kohler replacement bottle (it has no lid, and I have no idea what this is supposed to replace)
Armband for iPhone 6+ (Well, that’s about 5 years too late.)
XL Underarmour polo (the day this “loose” fit fits my husband will be a disappointing day indeed)
Agents of Shield Season 2 (Everyone knows the best season is the one where Fitz is a bad Hydra guy in handsome suits)
Sparkplug (I literally know nothing about what to do with this)
Music note bottle opener (okay, I love this and it’s hard to be snarky. But none of my family is musical)
Unicorn sequin notebook (I am disappointed in myself for loving this. I’m a grown woman, not a tween writing poetry about my feelings.)
6 Birdies (pretty sure we gave up our rackets, after my boys tried to use them as lethal weapons on each other)
“Leviton 23652-NP Fluorescent lampholder, med Bi-pin with. internal shunt” (no idea what that means.)
And the quintessential piece of crap: a beanie (or toque for the Canadians) celebrating the win of the Carolina Panthers in the 50th Super Bowl. (Yeah, the Broncos won that one.)
Ah, sweet disappointment. The only greater disappointment would have been to miss out.