Well well well…what is this? I am hosting two events in one week and I get stuck with man-ties again!? Just wait until I have to deal with the Manzier or “The Bro.”
Alright. Alright settle down Wooters…settle down…
Wait. I see you acting up back there ThunderThighs and Pepper. I have a can of something on my desk…want me to use it?
Ok now…let’s get this rolling. I know many might have certain…“questions”…if you want to call them that on how well this “fits.”
Well let me answer the most pressing question I seem to get:
Does this come with a shoehorn?
No this does not come with a shoehorn to “assist” you and your Magical Mantis™.
With that out of the way, I am going to be focused on my pickleless sandwiches and reruns of Simon & Simon. I finished all of I Love Lucy.
I better not be disturbed by pictures or memes of a Praying Mantis while I am gone.
Are these tactical?
Are you trying to mount a Bat Belt to them? Or want a tear gas feature? Perhaps armor?
Planning on running around your neighborhood fighting crime?
Thumbs up if you are. I might even join you with a tactical Manzier.
How do they do as a hat? Asking for a friend.
Works poorly. Although I hear that if you do wear one like a cap or beanie then it can induce male pattern baldness.
You killed my dream of eating pickles. I loved pickles. I will not forget that. 
You can blame my balding pickle-loving ex-husband (son’s Daddy) for that one. LOL.
Well, blame my son. He’s the one that put two and two together on that one at the ripe old age of 8.
You told me the story though! 
If you hadn’t I would still be eating pickles!
And you are still telling it to me!
You are ruthless. You are the Cersei Lannister of Woot. Pickle Killer. 
Yeah. They sell empty pickle jars and broken dreams here.
And bath tub liners. So there’s that…
@Williamdavi Do you need more underwear?
I DONT WANT THESEEEEEEEE
But the ones @davejlives sent you will be drafty.
I only want them if they come with pickles but I can’t even have that now!
Pepper wants a crime fighting tactical option and I just want a pickle.
I’ve already stuffed all those in his gas tank after I siphoned out the gas
Let me in the warehouse and I’ll make sure they come with pickles
William you are a true man of the people. A hero we all need. Now lets storm that warehouse and find the pickles.
Do these have pockets?
I just hit pause on Simon & Simon to read this question. Pause.
These do not have pockets to fit tactical knives, tear gas, pepper spray, or other protection.
Come on.