"The Person Below Me" ~ A game of assumptions


Actually, I accomplished that 2 months ago. I was sad to learn that the French call FRENCH FRIES “chips”, and they call FRENCH TOAST “burnt egg bread”. They also call FRENCH KISS “tongue wrestling”.

The person below me travels from NY to Chicago just to eat pizza.


Really it was just 4 hours to West Virginia for Coconut Pie - SO WORTH IT!

The person below me has a funny story involving a chicken, a roll of duct tape, and a spatula.


My six year old ate a chicken nugget, wrapped in duct tape, using a spatula. Then cried when she realized she forgot to put on ketchup.

The person below me writes letter to foreign dictators in hopes of them becoming his pen pal.


Sure! The only ones that have written back are Kim Jong-un and Ali Khamenei. I think that they are just lonely and need someone to talk to. We traded recipes…

The person below me still wonders what magic holds airplanes up in the air.


Yes! Also, how does the fax machine work? The paper goes in here, and comes out there… SORCERY!

The person below me can knit a tea cozy in 20 minutes flat while humming the National Anthem.


But only the national anthem of Uganda, for some reason I mess up the tea cozy when humming any other national anthem.

The person below me feels that that the US national anthem is outdated, and has written a newer version.


The old one didn’t include important stuff like bacon, beer, pickup trucks, lazy dogs or hamburgers. I’m almost done writing it so I can submit it to the President.

The person below me saves every coupon they can locate, hoping to build a retirement nest-egg with them.


Nope. Just a nest. It sure is cozy.

The person below me is 3 sheets to the wind.


only 2 sheets. my clothes line is really short, only 2 sheets will fit at one time…

the person below me, licks all the icing off the cupcake and throws the cake part in the trash…


Why do you make it sound like there is something wrong with that? I get all the sugar with none of the carbs!

The person below me still uses a Palm Pilot


I know nothing of such things…I was snickered at for having a flip phone last week, though.

The person below me has BIG plans for this weekend.


I do have BIG plans!! I plan on watching BIG. I love the scene with Tom Hanks dancing on the giant piano.

The person below me is seaching ebay, looking for a laptop which comes with IBM OS2 Warp pre-installed


I was looking, but when I saw I’d need to upgrade from the system I’m used to (Windows 1.0), I changed my mind.

The person below me is able to eat just one potato chip.


only, if they are pringles… i ate em… once…

the person below me… has been afraid of ants ever since they watched the movie, “the naked jungle”…


Then I saw Phase IV and became absolutely terrified.

The person below me misses the comic genius of Ed Sullivan


Yup. Him and Carson. The comedians now don’t hold a candle to those two legends.

The person below me writes to OJ Simpson, offering assistance in his search for the real killers.


This because I like drinking orange juice while watching The Simpsons. And, I also may have a pair of gloves that will fit him.

The person below me thinks that one-syllable words are much better then the other words.


Do I ? What makes you think that ? Do you look at my sent mail ? Or was it the group talk last night ? I guess you might be right.

The person below me picked so many strawberries this weekend they are running out of ideas of what to do with them. They even made strawberry lasagna .


Strawberry Lasagna was surprisingly good. Strawberry Alfredo on the other hand…

The person below me types in phonetic pig-latin


aybeMay Iay oday, utbay igpay atinlay siay oinggay otay ebay ethay anguagelay veryoneeay peakssay omedaysay.

The person below me carefully irons and folds all of their paper money.