this is backwards… my kid works at at a pizza joint. so i have 1 way to order 5 pizzas via delivery and never need to pay…
the person below me , went to the pet store today and bought a gecko and crickets. was so excited about this gecko told everyone that they were naming the gecko SPIKE! and upon leaving the store screamed for everyone to hear, “I am so Psyched for Spike!!!”
I was so excited for Spike… then the crickets ate him… I was so confused, then I realized I got “Carnivorous Mutant Crickets” so I released them to the wild… they seem to be doing well, although my neighbors don’t seem to like them…
The person below me has their name on the Missing persons list seven times, but they haven’t even been found once…
Well have you seen Chronicles of Narnia? well that wardrobe is a pretty accurate description of my cookie jar. Its a doorway to Wootless-landia, a terrifying place you don’t want to get lost in. So until I can cast this cookie jar into mount doom, I’m using the shock collar.
The person below me visited the future and confirmed that the iPhone 37 is no different than the iPhone 7 except it has apple’s 15th version of custom charging cable as they still refuse to us a micro USB
Ya. Apple claims they are going for a retro feel with their newest phone. But as we all learned with the iPhone 34, apple makes its money in the chargers, not the phone.
In fact, their business model is give the razor, sell the blade. (This used to work for printers until Sony Printer Powder killed that business model)
The person below me thinks that WWE is real and the NBA is scripted.
Well the Sign was going to have “Homer’s Nuts” written on it, and below it a picture of Bart kicking Homer… well you know where… and Homer would be yelling “Doh” with the chat bubble perfectly placed between “Homer’s” and “Nuts”
The person below me can owns seventeen and a half seafood restaurants, but is so allergic to shellfish that they only enter their restaurants by quarantining themselves by wearing a full deep sea diving suit.
First of all, it is 17 and 3/4 seafood restaurants (the 3/4 store is a cart outside the open market, closed on weekends)
Secondly, I don’t have the issue when going into the kosher store as there is no shellfish sold there.
Thirdly, we don’t sell shellfish in the restaurant named “Who you calling Shellfish?”. Which is kinda ironic.
The person below me gets EXTREMELY upset that the words IRONIC and AWFUL arent used they way they were initially defined.
I’m so mad right now. My shirts are wrinkled and need to be ironic. The trouble is… I have more laundry to wash and the washer machine is awful of clothes already!!! Why can’t people just talk rightly and understandurbly?
The person below me is not going to eat, drink or sleep until they get a Bucket O Crabapples from woot.