"The Person Below Me" ~ A game of assumptions

#661

i have to eat Lyin Main Soup everyday from folks, i got a belly full! don’t know the recipe…

the person below me… has talked with the wisest person on the earth and is going to tell us all that they have learned…

#662

I have just learned that spending two days glued to my computer does not get me a BOC from Woot. Failure and disappointment abound.

The person below me has finished their Christmas shopping and we all hate them.

#663

I bought a few things online while sitting here in my undies. But, be honest, you hate me for other reasons as well.

The person below me gives snowboarding lessons in their Hawaii home

#664

(/adds to my bucket list) salutes I’ll do my best to make it true before I’m fifty!

The person below me is completely confused by DJ Earworm’s United States of Pop this year, but has listened to it enough to feel comfortable with the weirdness.

#665

and the reason I’m confused is because DJ are my initials.

On the other hand the person below me has the initials N.O. which plays havoc with people’s feelings when asked politely for their signature.

#666

nah, my initials are MF, i just say N.O. sometimes and my folks don’t like to hear that…

the person below me…

wishes their initials were MF…

#667

Trust me, when your name is Andrea Samantha Stroeble, you very much your initials were MF

The person below me cried everytime they read “Casey at the Bat”

#668

Cried? Past tense? No, I cry each time that I read it. I don’t dare read it more than 3 times a Summer, because if I did, I could cause a catastrophic flood with the abundance of my tears. Not to mention my yearly weeping for my favorite major league baseball team that hasn’t won a World Series since 1984.

The person below me sings in Gilbert & Sullivan’s comic operettas, and played one of the leads in the Mikado.

#669

Unfortunately, It was for one performance, during a blizzard, in some small town outside of Calgary, and only 3 people showed up.

The person below me is in th eprocess of suing Woot cause their Bag0FCrap contained no actual crap, neither in human, nor in animal form.

#670

Then, I looked closer & noticed my B0C did contain a carp. I figured that’s close enough.

The person below me is saving any B0C they get from woot, to remain unopened. This is their retirement plan.

#671

I’m telling you, there is going to be one of those limited edition beanie babies inside. It’s gonna be a huge windfall BABY!!!

The person below me wants to know why there is no Meat.Woot.com department yet on the site

#672

It’s downright perplexing. Especially since bacon is so popular. I mean… there are over 40 tees on Shirt Woot that are about bacon!

The person below me wishes all Christmas trees were purple because it’s their favorite color.

#673

And, besides, green is just SOOOOO old fashioned. Purple is the color of the future.

The person below me has a patent in bacon flavored cheese, and they are going to use this cheese to open a unique chain of pizza stores

#674

Not only are we going to have bacon flavored cheese, the crust, completely bacon.

The person below me is definitely not a robot.

#675

maybe i am?? i do the same shit everyday, and i don’t know why?

the person below wishes they were a bird, so they could fly far, far away…

#676

Run Forrest…RUN!!!

Actually, it is so that I can both fly far far away, as well as poop onto freshly washed cars.

The person below me stocked up on guns and ammo back in the 60s to protect themselves from the “British Invasion”

#677

You bet I did! I bought out a hunting store, and stored all of the guns and ammo in my Yellow submarine!

The person below me wishes they could make a living by making snow angels and building snowmen.

#678

I almost sold one of my snow angels and two of my snow men. I brought them into the house to fit them into boxes, but someone stole them overnight & wet all over the carpet!!

The person below me collects snowflakes, hoping to find two identical ones.

#679

And I’ve spend hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to find a way to preserve the snowflakes in their original form, with no such luck.

The person below me was once asked to sing the National Anthem at an NBA game, but when it got time for them to sing, they sang the theme of Pinky and the Brain instead

#680

Yep! Sigh… my secret longing to take over the world got the better of me… :frowning: There goes 5 of my 15 minutes of fame.

The person below me is training fleas to do jumping jacks in a big bowl of figgy pudding.