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Microfiber, that means plastic, plastic is not absorbent. These are not real towels.
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Microfiber…The kittehs don’t like it. 
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The shamwow isn’t absorbent then?
Absorbency isn’t just the fabric, it’s also the weave.
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From the Google:
When microfibers are split, they are 200 times thinner than a single human hair . These split microfibers become much more absorbent.