Obviously it’s a pirate them. I wanted to laugh, chuckle, and even guffaw. Give me your best effort! Do as many as you want.
They’ll be posted in the next posts. Just pick your favorite, hit reply and have at it. Maybe you want to do it as a conversation, a newspaper blurb, or perhaps marketing copy for some new product.
As always, PG-13 is appreciated.
To get you started:
Wait a second! Diamonds, gold, silver. Where’s the cupcake lipstick? The Woot! shirt? No bags of sweet Texas air?
If you get that bulge close to me again, I will blow it off!
-or-
Man in the middle: What are you so excited about? I suggest you calm yourself, lad. You almost poked my eye out!
Man on the left: Sir, our maps indicate we’re on the path to the legendary bag of crap.
Man on the right:You REALLY believe in those drunken tales of riches? Do you think I would be sitting here right now if I knew there was a real bag of crap out there in the seas? NO, and you will not make a fool out of me!!! Go back to swabbing the decks!!!
Pirate 1 - YE TOLD ME it would work with me Macintosh, ye sallow faced bilge blower!
Pirate 2 - Yarr. I don’t, in truth, be knowin’ what a Macintosh is.
Listen mister! I’ve seen Zorro, and no matter what you keep telling me, you’re not him! Yes, you’re good with a sword and you talk funny too, but it’s just not the same thing!
-=C=-
Pirate 2: All you fools know I gots so many lasses lined up. 40-inch helm, and you know my kegs are so fresh a-
Pirate 1: Would you QUIT IT with this pimp act!! It’s getting on my nerves! We haven’t had women on this boat since our port call in Valencia, you moron! Now get out of those ridiculous clothes and mend the mizzen!