Ready…
since I didn’t video this grand opening, I’ll give you the play by play of how it went down. My 12 year old tried to video but was too excited.
all actors are played by themselves.
Tony - me
wife - my wife
12 - my 12 year old
16 - couldn’t care less and is off in the distance
18 - my 18 year old - begining to hover at the excitement.
Me - (open the front door and enter house)
12 - “Did it come, did it come?” (runs to get her camera)
me - “yep, right here”
12 - (jumping up and down) “the box is so big”
me - “let’s go to the table and open it”
(wife and 18 beging to hoover)
me - (getting a pair of scissors and cutting the tape) “here we go”
(open flap #1)
12 - “what’s that!!!” (grabing at flap #2)
me - “it’s a Daiwa sports bag”
12 - “ooooh, I like it, it’s sooo cool” (puts the camera down and begins to tear at the plastic bag around the sports bag)
wife - (looks into box) “what in the world is that?”
me - “a POC toy shave set”
wife - “when did they get that, 1952?”
me - (with a smile) “ask for crap, get crap”
12 - (looking into box once again) “what’s this?” (grabbing at a smaller box)
me - “probably 6 of the Cinderella Video CD Thing everyone is getting.”
12 - “how did you know that?”
me - “X-ray vision… cool huh?”
wife - “how much did you pay for this???”
me - “8 bucks”
wife - “OK”
me - “and this must be the ** Snowman speakers** everyone is getting.”
(plug in snowman, watch the lights go around)
12 - (all giggily) “that is awesome!!!”
(12 gets a strange look from wife)
me - “you can plug your mp3 player into it”
wife - “18, go get your ipod”
(plug in ipod, play Straight No Chaser christmas songs)
wife - “18 can take that to college”
12 - “whaaaattttt???”
18 - “yeah, it will probably last a week”
12 - “I want the bag” (ripping the packaging out of the sports bag)
me - “what are those?”
12 - “I pulled them out of this” (refering to the sports bag)
me - “oh, better list 2 bags of Chinese air”
wife - “take the boxes back to work with you…Oh, and this crap” (tossing the toy shave kit and Cinderella boxes at me)
me - “going to the game tonight?”
(12 skips off with her new sports bag, 18 sits with snowman singing Christmas Carols)
wife - “yes, we’re leaving at 5:30”
(fade to black)
There you have it… the epic story of the 9.2 lb bag of crap.
(c) copyright tonygua all rights reserved
